Do you know what you’re doing?
The title of this post is a response I’ve received many times and it may very well be true. What I’ve found though, is that knowing what I’m doing and working with a coach don‘t necessarily correlate. Just because I know what I’m doing, doesn’t mean I don't get to work with a coach. More times than not, working with a coach is more out of desire than necessity. The best athletes on the planet who coincidentally happen to be some of the most physically superior human beings on the planet, who also coincidentally know what they’re doing, have coaches.
Whats up with that? If they know what they’re doing and are in such incredible shape, why the hell do they hire a coach and regular people are resistant towards making that investment?
Well, I’m not one to assume so I won’t try to answer for other people but I will share from my own experience in investing in coaching. The three things I get to consider are, “am I willing to invest my time, money, and effort into the program I am considering? Do I feel there is value behind it? Am I confident in myself to do the work required on my end as it’s always a two way street. I can receive the best coaching ever or receive the most perfectly designed program, but if I don’t take action, no results will follow.
What I’ve found is that I am my greatest block or obstacle. I tend to get in my way. So, if nothing else, working with a coach provides me objective feedback. Someone who is not emotionally invested in me who won’t co-sign my bullshit. I will tell myself I’m good or that everything is okay when everything is most certainly not okay.
There is also the saying, “you don’t know what you don’t know” and how true this is! I may know a lot which will provide me just that much more of a foundation to move forward with. However, I don’t know absolutely everything there is to know about everything. That would be pretty egotistical of me to think.
Don’t you think so?
There is also the accountabilty to factor in as a benefit of working with a coach. I can hypothetically know everything there is to know about everything but unless I apply that knowledge and act, nothing will change. How often do we say, “I know what to eat”, ”I know what to do”, “I know”!! The problem rarely lies with what we know, it‘s in the doing!! In being accountable to someone other than ourselves, when we try to tell our story of why we didn't stick to our commitment, our coach is there to call bullshit.
When it comes to exercise and our lifestyle outside of the gym, two questions you can ask yourself are, “how good am I at getting started?” and, “How good am I at not stopping once I’ve started?”. Simply not quitting is really the key to everything. It may be simple, but it‘s definitely not easy! We all go through the ebb and flow of life. We have good times and bad times. The trick is, not quitting on ourself thinking somehow we will be able to serve the ones we love better. We cannot give out what we don‘t have ourself. No matter how bad we want to be other people’s saviors, we cant save anyone. We can only be supportive of the ones we love and that is contingent on our individual state of being.
Another benefit of when I have invested in coaching is I get to allocate that part of my life to my coach. I don’t have to worry about planning and figuring everything out as that’s my coaches job. I get to focus on the things in my life that I’m really good at and leave the rest to them!!
The very best thing we can do to help those around us is continue to focus and work on ourselves no matter what the circumstances. To this point in my career, I have worked with lots of mom’s and the big challenge I face with them is they think the answer is not putting themselves first, and focusing on their family.
This isn’t just moms though. Many people do this and its unfortunate but there is always support available!!
I hope this gave you some things to think about and maybe consider before you say, “I’m not interested, I know what I’m doing”.
As a good friend of mine says, “If it can’t hurt you, and it can possibly help you, then why not?
A grateful son paying it forward to other moms.