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Mom’s being Martyr’s

There is nothing more powerful than the power of example. What example are you setting?

This is the question I help the moms I work with because it’s been my experience, that moms at some point, become martyrs. They do everything and anything for everyone else and stop doing things for themselves. Their reasons for not taking care of themselves are because the holidays are coming up, their kids have sporting events, their husband is working, etc. This may be true, but what is also true is that you can have both. You can be there for your family and also take care of yourself!

Your family wants to see you live a long healthy life. None of us knows when our time is up but we can control our behavior and how we live our life. In fact, how we live our life is a greater contributor to how we feel than our biological age. If you can’t squat down to the ground without a problem, thats not your age, that’s your lifestyle.

I watched an 80 year old woman deadlift 225lbs!!!! With this as an example, it shows how we look, feel, and perform is subjective. If being older impacted our quality of life was objectively true, every person on this planet at a certain age would lose the ability to do various activities. This is obviously not the case.

Someone is always watching and for moms, that would be your children!! When they see you get motivated about starting to exercise, they get motivated! They get excited for you!! When they see you quit, they wonder why. Why did you quit? Was it really due to the story you told everyone?

There is usually more to it than your story. So why did you quit? Do you feel worthy enough to have success? Do you believe you deserve joy? Of course you do!! However, we can’t give out what we don‘t have. If we don’t love ourselves enough to see things through, this will show up in all of our relationships. Our connection with other people starts with the connection we have with ourself.

We all grow up with our own experience and it’s this experience that conditions our beliefs. The cool thing is, we get to break the cycle! We get to change and be the example we want in the world!! We are all responsible for our own life. The outcomes you experience are yours and yours alone.

My mom was my example and boy was I blessed! She is the whole reason I work with moms today. I know first hand, how important it is to have a mom lead by example. What I do for a living, who I help, the way I live my life was all inspired by the example my mom set.

What example are you setting for your children? What are they seeing you do? Have your behaviors started becoming their behaviors? Have your words started to become their words? Is this what you want? In your heart, if the answer is yes, keep being that example!!! If you see some red flags, it might be time to start loving on yourself. It might be time to stop listening to your ego and telling your story. How you treat yourself is how your children will treat themselves.

Jim Rohn once said, “we are the average of the five people we spend the most time with”. Are you one of the five people your children spend the most time with?

If we want other people to be different, if we want our spouses to be different, if we want our children to be different, we get to be different! The change starts with us.

Be the example you want to see because those that see you will be you.


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